Creating a Compassionate Divorce Community » Archive of 'Jul, 2017'

A breakthough, seemingly years, maybe “decades” in the making: Firm Forgiveness

For years, I have struggled to discover the appropriate response to what could be considered “vile” behavior. the notion of finding the third way, goes back to Jesus, if not before, the middle path, actually was identified by Buddha as well. I like to refer to it as well, as the assertive path; in between aggressive and passive behavior. In this day and age, we are confronted, with vile, if not evil behavior in the emergence of extreme narcissistic and psychopathic behavior. I have long sought the appropriate response; as people with those actions can be debilitating, AND also they are clearly not well, and do not know much of what they are doing.

Today, in a last burst, I founded the concept of “firm forgiveness.” Firm meaning that it is our job as responsible leaders to pave a way towards a calm and peaceful society, filled with appropriate behavior, and holding those who act out accountable. Forgiving, in terms of the aim being education and setting appropriate limits and not pushing the full force of punishment on miscreant behavior.

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I read an interesting quote recently, something like:”Systems are evil; people are not…”

Essentially connoting that it is a group mentality that can produce evil; not the individuals themselves. In this regard I am moved to “consider carefully” the state of our modern day divorce system. The amount of political, legal, able law enforcement, financial and emotional pressure that goes into such a thing, is horrific on some level.

Let’s begin with the sense that couples often are in a position, perhaps it is changing, but at a basically high school level of break-up in an emotional sense. Maybe now, people are slightly more attuned; yet nothing in the world can prepare a person for the pressure once the divorce system kicks in. There are lawyers, and court officers, and police and judges, and psychologists; ALL often with the fierce force of gravity that seeks to pound a person into submission on some level. Most of us surely would condemn any and all instances of domestic violence. Yet, we cannot treat every familial break-up like that form of violence is the norm. Rather the opposite. Most people need a caring and understanding approach.

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Amazing Grace

Sometimes, you can only sit back and essentially, enjoy the process of life. A remarkable effort in certain areas, and then it is time to let go in some ways. Recognizing what is in your control, and what is not, is an important facet of life. For those who overstep their boundaries with you, and know no better; at times, after considerable work, forgiveness can be a wonderful remedy of sorts. Every experience has the opportunity for equal or greater learning and growth.

So enjoy the ride; take in the day, above all else at times, trust the process. Trusting the process, implies that you have a process in the first place. That is where the Science of Inner Strength, and the Science of Inner Strength Honor come into play. In these most challenging times, it is vital to learn the secrets and elements of resiliency and the movement towards Prosperity and Purpose. Both elements are needed; we get the interest in making money, it must be combined with the commitment to positive purpose. The world needs both.

Thanks, Jon

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The man who broke hatred and/or breaking narcissism

That seems like it is one of my aims; to do something significant like breaking narcissism and/or hatred itself. That is what the Science of Inner Strength and my life is about. I am working to get to the core of human animus itself; discovering those reasons and happenstances, as to why people decide to hate and/or act in lesser capacities. A major situation I am working on, has to do with extreme narcissism, and seemingly hatred itself, as to why a person or persons will attack and hate on another person so relentlessly.

It gets to the emptiness inside, which is why the Science of Inner Strength, with respect to its finding the spiritual light within us is such an antidote to animus itself. Once people feel a sense of worth, purpose, even spiritual center within them; they then become much less likely to act in hurtful and distressful ways. We have a lot of hurt people these days, who for the most part do not know it.

With no aspersions, we must help people heal and learn goodness.

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Back to order it is:

This morning, I encountered a neighbor, who gave me something of mine, and uttered the words: “Back to order.” Those words seem like a metaphor for a major mediation that I am working on. Sometimes, in our human experience things take on an Alice in Wonderland type of effect, where up is down and down is up. Such is the confusion with much of the change in our modern world.

While I embrace change and its advancements so much; I am also a proponent of not throwing out the baby for the bathwater. Human culture has much to improve upon; and yet, we must also bear in mind ALL of the progress that has occurred, and function with a sense of appreciation for that which has come before us. Substantial change does not mean throwing out, everything that has come before. It is a matter of adapting the social sensitivity and emotional empathy that is needed for all human beings, while upholding our collective determination and destiny that has preceded us!

Those who pose a false choice are acting Moronic.

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