Creating a Compassionate Divorce Community » Posts for tag 'Jon Myers'

Societal good; it is about societal good baby:

The more I go through; the more I get cleansed by ALL of what life has to offer me; the stronger and purer I get. In that regard, I uphold the sense that it is about societal good. The capacity to heal and help the world; si where my life and work take hold. It is fun, to glide through life with a sense that there is something significant that we are offering. Don’t get me wrong; it has taken me monumental epochs of challenge, if not pain itself, to reach the point of gliding at times.

That is where the Science of Inner Strength comes in. It is finding your true self, and then developing that core purpose that can essentially pull you through virtually anything. To those who do not agree, on some level, I send compassion. I came back to my notion of firm forgiveness today, and how setting firm limits first, for those who act, and then leaning back with a sense of forgiveness and compassion can be an excellent course to go. Time for lunch.

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Maturity is so important

We live in a time of amazing challenge in this country right now, and individuals, families, organizations and this country as a whole, needs emotional maturity. This type of maturity is something that Calm Interventions provides, in its work and training with clients and people in general. Qualities such as the capacity to work with and hear perspectives other than our own; define our inner core, and special qualities that make us positively standout; and having a sense of self, so that we take things seriously, but not so seriously as to forget the true nature of life.

Understanding the true nature of life, is to understand a peace and a patience with things; as well as to realize that there are things greater than ourselves, which work their own way in the development and furtherance of the world. What is hard for people to see sometimes, is that the direction of our world is forward towards progress, even with the great challenges that we face. Our challenges strengthen us and reveal areas needed for further work. Thanks plenty, Jon

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Patience and perseverance it is:

Today, I reached an insight in a situation that I have been working on for a while, that was astonishing and unexpected. It is funny, when you are working on something substantial, you can be close to the right answer for a long time; but not exactly on it. It is kind of like one of those games, where you have to get the ball, to fall into the hole. Sometimes, it can take a long time for the ball, to keep going by the hole, before it falls in.

I am not certain, as stepping back a tad, AND sleeping on it, may provide some further insight; still it seems possible. In any event, I read something recently that was inspiring, along the lines: “Don’t wait until you reach your goal to be proud; be proud of what you have done until now.” In that regard, I am proud, a great success, is built upon many smaller successes, so time and patience will tell.

I wonder sometimes, are reaching our goals real success, or is it the journey too?

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Keeping the faith

The journey towards greatness can be a long and winding road, with  many ups and downs. One thing that is most important is the capacity to keep a positive attitude in the face of all of these challenges. I read, an interesting quote by Steve Jobs, this morning, essentially saying that every morning he looked in the mirror, and asked himself if today was the last day of his life; would he be doing something that he wanted to do?

As challenging as it is, I can sincerely say yes, that I am doing the things that I want to be doing. Having the opportunity to work on complex human challenges, is what I love to do. Having a sense that I am developing new human understandings, or at least having a commitment to working to defeat hatred, in our lifetimes, and that kind of thing, is enormously inspiring to me. There surely; are setbacks and a lack of understanding from others. Yet, that is the beauty of doing something new, by definition others do not see it yet. Thanks.

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The Science of Inner Strength

It is a wonderful day, a Friday afternoon, as it turns out. Wowsie, has a ton of work gone into things. Sometimes, we just need to let go a bit, and see how it all unfolds. A certain delivery is taking longer than expected, and I am trusting. Some material has arrived for me, in another location, and I will similarly be trusting, that everything has value, it is all unfolding for a reason. There is only so much we can do at any one juncture; that is where patience comes in.

Ah yes, the Science of Inner Strength. Well, as far as I can see, it is a new, a higher even way of thinking and acting. Humankind has reached a certain juncture, and it seems like profound change is on the way. The Science for me began and probably still begins with the capacity to understand extreme narcissistic and even psychopathic behaviors, AND the characteristics of emotional abuse. The route to changing human behavior for the better, and the world as well, begins with understanding emotional abuse.

Jon

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Defeating Hatred: The issue of our time: As my work evolves.

As I continue on down, my merry road; AND the work continues, I find myself prospectively running into that wonderful topic for my life and my work; that of defeating hatred and animus. It is a virtual societal plague the way people are acting, on some level, and guess what? So much of it is learned behavior; we are actually teaching people to be rude and crude to one another. Wowsie, where is that one going?  Along with, to me, superseding, ALL of the other societal challenges that one will run us into a ditch.

So, perhaps that is my magic calling out of all of the work of the past going on twenty-two years, the work of furthering our discussion and efforts to defeating hatred. I mean, it has been ensconced in our human condition for millennia; still we are at a turning point in human history. People will either get it or not, and most will over time. It is the journey and effort to defeat hatred; perhaps that will be my ultimate calling.

Thank you.

Sincerely,

Jon

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An amazing moment

Today, I have a wonderful feeling. I worked hard on something; thought is DOA, and then swoop, somehow, the current of life, picked me up and carried me through a certain finish line. I am proud; I had done the previous work, but for some reason, things had slipped back from the front of my mind, while dealing with the real world of life itself. This morning the inspiration came to me, and I actuated that energy necessary to carry me forward; and so it is.

Sometimes, it is those little challenges of life that provide us, with a sense of clarity and direction. So now, I have accomplished something on one front. Perhaps time for a mini-break, before proceeding on the next front. Life can be great, in spite of the pains and challenges. So now, let’s see how things go. Let go and let God, or let the universe pave the way, or whatever floats your boat. I am grateful for the US Open tennis as well. Four US women, and Del Potro versus Rafa, up next Wowsie.

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Defeating Hatred

On some level, one of my greatest life ambitions, is to start the conversation about defeating hatred. The direction of our world, seems so snide at times; AND for the most part it is learned behavior. It most be a fear-based notion of people acting with all due respect like there is something much larger to fear. Such is our world. Where is that notion of FDR: “That there is nothing to fear but fear itself.” The capacity to develop win-win approaches for ourselves and others is so important in this day and age, and the popular mindset, is more a fearful notion of just taking care of our ourselves, no matter how mean and rude we are acting.

Somehow this negative cycle must be broken, and the work of creating positive, win-win elements must be fortified. That is really the essence of Calm Interventions work; helping people develop positive images, develop win-win approaches, and all kinds of things, aimed to bring out our best. I do not know everything, but I know a positive attitude is our greatest aim.

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A breakthough, seemingly years, maybe “decades” in the making: Firm Forgiveness

For years, I have struggled to discover the appropriate response to what could be considered “vile” behavior. the notion of finding the third way, goes back to Jesus, if not before, the middle path, actually was identified by Buddha as well. I like to refer to it as well, as the assertive path; in between aggressive and passive behavior. In this day and age, we are confronted, with vile, if not evil behavior in the emergence of extreme narcissistic and psychopathic behavior. I have long sought the appropriate response; as people with those actions can be debilitating, AND also they are clearly not well, and do not know much of what they are doing.

Today, in a last burst, I founded the concept of “firm forgiveness.” Firm meaning that it is our job as responsible leaders to pave a way towards a calm and peaceful society, filled with appropriate behavior, and holding those who act out accountable. Forgiving, in terms of the aim being education and setting appropriate limits and not pushing the full force of punishment on miscreant behavior.

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I read an interesting quote recently, something like:”Systems are evil; people are not…”

Essentially connoting that it is a group mentality that can produce evil; not the individuals themselves. In this regard I am moved to “consider carefully” the state of our modern day divorce system. The amount of political, legal, able law enforcement, financial and emotional pressure that goes into such a thing, is horrific on some level.

Let’s begin with the sense that couples often are in a position, perhaps it is changing, but at a basically high school level of break-up in an emotional sense. Maybe now, people are slightly more attuned; yet nothing in the world can prepare a person for the pressure once the divorce system kicks in. There are lawyers, and court officers, and police and judges, and psychologists; ALL often with the fierce force of gravity that seeks to pound a person into submission on some level. Most of us surely would condemn any and all instances of domestic violence. Yet, we cannot treat every familial break-up like that form of violence is the norm. Rather the opposite. Most people need a caring and understanding approach.

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